1. Donate ALL items that are no longer needed in our household.
2. Redecorate the whole house so that it finally is the place I've always dreamt of.
3. Lose 20 lbs.
4. Schedule weekly:
-business meetings
-date nights with Sexy Bunz
5. Keep practicing guitar. Getting better every day.
6. Become a bonafide vegetarian.
7. Write down birthdays and actually utilize a schedule book.
8. Bake more.
9. Stop sweating the small stuff.
10. Practice gratitude every day for a wonderful, healthy family, great friends and a thriving business that allows me to create! How awesome is that?
11. Finish my work studio.
12. Send a care package to 2 lovely ladies. I love you, Ibuna Garza!
13. Cling to moments of mental clarity.
14. Mean what you say and say what you do.
15. Build and diversify my business.
Number 15 brings me to a new venture. I will no longer update this blog on the regular. I have started another blog that is so much fun! It also has more to do with my business and offers creative D.I.Y. projects. Also, it will have tons of great video and solid playlists. So far, it has been the most exciting time of my life and I look forward to sharing it with you.
Please drop me an email at lolaandgeorge@yahoo.com and I will give you the new address. Don't be shy! I know you guys are out there! If I know you personally, I will invite you via facebook to join in on the fun.
And now, the gift of music from my favorite band right now...very reminiscent of Nick Cave.
I am so sorry to have neglected you for so long. I have a broken wrist and a mind full of ideas which, you can imagine, is very frustrating.
Things are changing rapidly for all of us in the beginning of this year. Soon, I will embark on an exciting project that I will tell you about in due time.
I am a one woman running episode of Seinfeld, and in it, I unfortunately play the role of George Costanza.
Here are the highlights of my day so far:
1. As I left my house to go visit Mimi at work, I glanced at my neighbor's house. Friday is trash day. They were tossing out a perfectly good office chair that was made out of cherry wood and a light tan leather. I am totally redoing my house right now so...I hoisted that motherfucker into the back of my truck and drove off. That, my friends, is what I like to call recycling. Suck on that Jack Johnson! It only occurred to me three hours later, after talking to Snivets on the phone, that the chair might be the carrier of disease. It might've been used in porno flicks. I might be the new owner of an Orgasm Chair. Or maybe our neighbors have a meth lab in their house and they spilled some toxic chemical on it that might make my nails fall off.
The solution to this problem: Lysol and a handi vac. Done and done.
According to Snivets, I could use a cleanser specifically designed to kill the AIDS virus and my chair would still have AIDS. Thanks, Bro.
2. Upon visiting my cousin at work, I set off three security alarms when exiting the store and failed to wait for the pat down. They probably think she was handing me items to steal, which neither of us would do in a million years (I realize that I just devoted the previous paragraph to an account of swiping my neighbor's office chair. That is totally different. Once that chair is on the street, it is fair game). I don't have time for 2 things in life: playing grab ass and horse shit. Pretty sure she might be getting fired sometime soon though.
3. There's this gas station called Fabulous Freddy's here in Vegas. They hire kids to pump your gas for you. I hate this service. I like pumping my own gas. It suits me just fine. I also think you have to tip them, which really irritates me because gas prices are through the roof right now. Why the shit would I pay someone to do something that I can do on my own?
Another annoying factor is that they bolt after you the moment you get out of your car, like crazy pan handlers.
"Would you like me to pump your gas for you?" Well, let me think about that, I am already out of my car, holding my credit card, and standing next to the gas pump. Yes, I think you should go ahead and pump it for me. Then, we can stand here in awkward silence while you wonder how much I will tip you and I do a mental inventory of how many quarters I have in my car.
"No thank you."
100% of the time, they will say, "Ok, well have a Fabulous day!" They're supposed to say that, only it comes across as totally sarcastic and passive aggressive. Why not just say "Have a Fabulous Day motherfucker. I hope you burn in hell!"
I literally RUN out of my car, swipe my card and start pumping gas in under 15 seconds because of Fabulous Freddy's. All to avoid the "Have a Fabulous day!"
In the spirit of "keeping it real," as this blog is more for me than for you, Dearest Rubbers of the Oat, I must be true to what is in my heart today.
Call it a blog cleanse.
I woke up this morning, like every other, feeling like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.
Went downstairs, sat the chitlins down at the breakfast table, and started making our usual Friday Chocolate Chip Smiley Pancakes.
While in the middle of pouring the batter, an image flashed through my mind. I had been organizing family pictures the previous night and ran across one of my beloved Abuelita drinking a coke. (I won't post it here today because that is mine, all mine.) For some reason, I had forgotten a slight detail about her; it was a look she got when she swallowed the fizzy bubbles. It made her look so alive...so very alive.
It was that gleam in her eyes, a quick synaptic flash through the brain, accompanied with a side of agony, that started the thoughts I usually no longer indulge.
Something told me that I needed to go with it this morning, while my unsuspecting children smacked their syrupy lips and sang happy love songs to me.
The image was of her funeral. I wore my favorite shoes in an attempt to make myself feel better. It started to pour rain. Virginia rain can be so oppressive, but this somehow seemed suiting. God, if there is one, was crying for our loss. My heels dug into the wet dirt. This was it, the moment I had been dreading since she got sick. Since we got her death sentence. The mud started to seep into my shoes, getting between my toes.
The priest did his da da da thing and we bowed our heads out of complete surrender.
No one wanted to leave her there, in that cold, rainy place, covered in the same mud that still stain my shoes today.
Anyways, back to the healing moment: the moment my brain had locked out and never allowed me to fully understand.
We went back to her house and I laid in her bed, trying to feel her presence. I wanted her to put her arms around me, laugh in my ear, cup my face the way she had done so many times before.
My aunt came in and saw my shoes hanging over the side of the bed.
"Carlita! You'll catch your death!"
She started taking my shoes off. All the girls, my dear cousins, her little loved ones now long grown up, sat there helplessly with wet shoes.
"All of you! Take your shoes off! You'll get sick!" and she reached into Abuelita's drawer. She pulled out socks, the fuzzy, soft, warm ones that she loved.
I didn't want her socks. I refused to put them on. In my head, I felt like we should ask her, out of respect, even though I knew my Abuelita would never deny me anything. The blinding pain didn't allow me to put together that she was gone. I would never again ask her for socks, a cup of hot chocolate or advice.
That message arrived to me this morning. I realized that if she still exists, somewhere in the unknown, floating around in the Bulk, she was still trying to give to us, still trying to care for us in her own way.
Socks at the very least.
Socks.
It felt good to let that out.
Also, I wanted to post a suitable song, a song that, incidentally, is one of my favorites by My Little Pony called I Don't Know. The search for the song was long and fruitless. Imeem gave me a 30 second version. No one else has heard of the band. I kept getting links for some very shady shady practices involving the real My Little Pony. I have the download available so if anyone is interested, comment me at the bottom of this post and I will email you a legit version of the song.
So here is what I could muster, some shitty, lame-o homemade music video taped on a phone cam. Please don't watch it. I don't want it to ruin a perfectly good song.
ONE TIME, A LONG TIME AGO...A HUNDRED HITS HAPPENED
THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL THE HITS! I don't know who you are or where you live, but if I did, I would clean your fridge with a toothbrush....then I'd melt it down into a prison style shank and stab myself to death
